Ending the Skirmish

Introduction:

• Over the past couple weeks, we have been talking about drama and conflict.
• Two weeks ago, we asked the question: What causes conflict? – Answer People get in the way of what we want.
• Last week we asked: What does God want to do in our conflicts? – Answer: Make us more like Jesus.
• Tonight, we ask: How should we respond to conflict? – Answer: Ask for and offer forgiveness.

Attention Funnel: Expectation vs. Reality 

• When I was in middle school, I wanted to be Allen Iverson. He was an incredible basketball player and a world-class rapper. Two of the things I aspired to as a 7^thgrader, and continue to aspire to as a 29-year-old. Although I’ve already achieved one of those things by now. He had an incredible crossover and could make some of the most ridiculous fade away shots… So I would spent my time doing those two things… meanwhile I could barely make a left-handed layup. I was so focused on the big flashy moves that I failed in some of the most basic things.
• Sometimes I think this is how we approach forgiveness… we only see the massive acts of forgiveness, while missing the small day-to-day aspect of forgiveness. And so if we haven’t had any really big hurts in our lives, we think forgiveness doesn’t apply to us… meanwhile we can’t manage to forgive a sibling when they take the last piece of food, or a parent when they have done something wrong to us.
• Some of you may have already experienced some really big hurts in your lives… and tonight’s lesson absolutely applies to you. If that is you and you are wrestling with forgiving someone, I would encourage you to share your story with a youth worker.
• But perhaps more of you are just struggling to do the day-to-day daily acts of forgiving people when they do something to offend you or make you angry.
• Tonight, I want to look at a well-known story in Matthew that Jesus told to see what we can learn and apply about this issue of forgiveness.

Big Idea: Resolve conflict by asking for and offering forgiveness.

 Passage: Matthew 18:21-35

 Main Points:

• Forgiveness is irrational.
• Refusing to forgive is even more irrational.
• Forgiveness in action.

Look at the Mess We’ve Made

Attention Funnel: Best Fight Scenes – Batman vs. Bane, Napoleon Dynamite, The Other Guys

Big Idea for the Series: Conflict is inevitable, but it doesn’t have to be bad.

Introduction:

• Conflict is inevitable.Term it what you want… disagreements, fights, quarrels, or as it so often gets labeled in High School: Drama.
  • We get annoyed, upset, and angry with each other. We say things we shouldn’t say. We get offended at someone else’s words. A conflict arises and far too often things get worse before they get better.
• But conflict doesn’t have to be bad.
  • We all have tendencies with conflict… Some of us treat it like day-old cheap Chinese food – Avoid at all costs.
  • Others of us treat conflict like the gym – We love the opportunity to flex our muscles and show off our biceps. We run into conflict to show how powerful we are by fighting until we get what we want.
• But conflict is a great opportunity. God has purposes in all of our conflict that he wants to accomplish in us.
  • This is why running from conflict can be so horrible.
    • We cut off friendships at the first sign of trouble… with nice phrases that cover over the real reason was because we got into a fight and refused to deal with it.
  • In fact, the best relationships are the ones where conflict happens (perhaps often) and is handled well.
  • We shouldn’t want a relationship that is conflict free… anymore than we would want a car that has been crash tested.
  • A car becomes safer because it has been crash-tested so many times.
  • A relationship becomes sweeter because conflict is faced and handled well.
• “We often think that if God really cared for us, he would make our relationships easier. In reality, a difficult relationship is a mark of his love and care. We would prefer that God would just change the relationship, but he won’t be content until the relationship changes us too. This how God created relationships to function. While we would like to avoid the mess and enjoy deep and intimate community. God says that it is in the very process of working through the mess that intimacy is found. Which relationships are most meaningful to you? Most likely they are the ones that involved working through difficulty and hardship.” (Lane and Tripp)

Over the next three weeks we are going to treat this issue of drama and conflict by asking and hopefully answering three questions:

1. What causes conflict?
2. What does God want to do in our conflicts?
3. How should we respond to conflict?

Passage: James 4:1-6

 Big Idea: We fight because people get in the way of what we want.

The Reality of Work–Problems & Perseverance

Keystone Church

Redeeming Work:  Connecting Our Work with God’s Work

Part 3:  The Reality of Work—Problems & Perseverance

10.13.13

 

Purpose:  Connect our work with God’s work.

 

Goal:  Endure opposition to God’s work.

 

Main Points

• All who desire to live a godly life in Jesus will be opposed.
• If God has called you to a great work, he will provide you with all the necessary grace to endure it.

Conflict Lesson #4

Conflict

Lesson #4

1.29.12

 

Main Ideas:

• Everyone sins.
• Those who sin should apologize and repent.
• Those who are sinned against should rebuke and forgive sinners.

Conflict Lesson #3

Conflict

Lesson #3

1.22.12

 

Main Ideas:

• Everyone sins.
• Those who sin should apologize and repent.
• Those who are sinned against should rebuke and forgive sinners.

Conflict Lesson #2

Conflict

Lesson #2

1.15.12

 

Main Idea:

• Conflict is unavoidable.
• There are rules when it comes to fighting.
• Pursue truth in love…not winning.

Conflict Lesson #1

Conflict

Lesson #1

1.8.12

Main Points:

• Conflict will arise.
• There are things worth fighting for.
• How will you fight in a way that honors God?
• Put on humility before walking into the ring.